I tend to write on a full stomach rather than empty so when I did this exercise, I was thinking more of drinks and snacks so my food tends to be less robust than what Stephen Fry came up with. However as the exercise is more about writing in the bang bang bang - crash! style ie alliterate three times and then change in a line, so it scarecly matters really what the subject matter is.
Here's my attempt and for those of you who don't yet know what alliteration is, you will by the end of the poem.
Things I Want or Don't Want to Eat or Drink Right Now:
Chocolate comes first or cocoa with froth,
A lemony drink or lime leached juice
Speedily hits the spot and sooths but then
Coffee doesn't. Caffeine kills my mind
But my body remains hyped: bouncing off the walls
I crave kana a lot, those clumps of fruit
Dried, salty, sour and sweet - I drool
Now that I'm done with drinks and desert, I desperately want
A Kaya toast: covered in coconut eggy jam
Thin crisp bits of bread, buttered and hot.
Or half-boiled eggs basting brown wholemeal toast
With soya sauce and pepper, spotting the yolk
Teh halia heaving with froth is heaven I think
So I'll stop soon enough to ready my mug
Yew tiao too is tea-dipping worthy
I wouldn't want wanton mee right now
Nasi lemak's not nice - too gelak
Oyster omelette oozes oil and lard
All these add on an extra pound or two
So to the gym I go and gallop on the treadmill.
7 comments:
You know, the only ones reading our pathetic verses are you and I and occasionally my mum, if I nag her. And v occasionally, my sis.
I should have said, the only ones that I know of... heaven knows who is smirking at our efforts.
I actually do have a few readers who read but never leave comments. But I don't think these exercises are meant to be that widely read as they are just exercises. Not that I disagree our verses are pathetic :).
I happened to read those verses too, looking for bang bang bang crash! poetry. Thank you for sharing them.
The book by Fry made me dig out and finish some old exercises, though I did not have the stamina to do his exercises. I did write a blog entry about the book, in which I quote a few of your lines. I hope that's okay.
I like to see gallops on the treadmil you sexy cow.
Interesting poetry. I've been looking for alliterative accentual poetry in modern English to help with a speech therapy client that has problems with prosody. Do you mind if I have him read it? I'll cite you, of course.
Well, if you're fine with this, you may have a few more readers. (And Jeff may have a greater range of alliterative poetry to have clients read. I recommend Bea Wolf, the children's book.) Check out https://alliteration.net/community/poetswriters/ and let me know if you're fine with me linking here, on my website about modern English alliterative verse.
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